I have a piece of rustic wall art in my office that says “if you never try you’ll never know.” It is painted in disused cursive script on rough barn board, and not even punctuated correctly (shame on them!). I found it a year or so ago when I was remodeling my office to accommodate my new living room, and since it matched the decor, I added it to a wall I see many times a day. I wanted it to serve as a reminder to drop the fear and live life–to go ahead and try.
In essence, the last eight years have been a great sequence of “tries” for me. But at the time, I rarely realized that, because I was going to DO not just try. Consequently, when things got more complicated or involved than I wanted to handle, I saw it as a failure that I had to end it. The fact that I did try and learned from the experience never entered my mind–I was just a failure. It took a stern conversation, a recovery from surgery and a lot of digging inside to realize that trying is what makes life, well life. The other piece of this is that I am a knowledge-hound and the thought of not knowing tears me up mentally. I always want to know.
When I look at things today, I find that I am doing nothing but trying. I joined an adult soccer league after 24 years of not playing. I am breeding turkeys, which consequently, are a lot of fun (who knew?). We have decided to sell our property in Vermont because we tried, but it is truly more than we need. I am learning to code for website development and studying SEO as well. The novel inside my head is being put on paper because an old college friend urged me to “JUST WRITE IT!” I am starting not one blog, but two! Finally, I am putting aside my fear of failure and beginning my efforts to establish a new career in a new field. I’m all in for trying!
In the end, whenever that may be, I will have gained knowledge on this path of trying. And I hope some success as well after the inevitable price of failure, in some respect, is paid. When I chose that artwork for the wall I knew I liked it, and I hoped it would become the mantra for my future. Perhaps seeing it many times each day has drilled it into my thought pattern and made it somewhat easier to lose the fear of the unknown and to try. What is there to lose besides the opportunity to reap knowledge and experience? At this point, I’m not willing to let that go.